I’ve noticed that a lot of “helpful” advice quietly assumes indifference or laziness.
Not exhaustion. Not overload.
Just… not caring enough.
It treats missed tasks like a values problem. Like if something mattered more, it would magically become easier to do. Which is comforting, I guess, if you’ve never had to negotiate with your own brain like a hostage negotiator, promising snacks and a better future.
Most advice doesn’t begin with curiosity. It begins with a conclusion.
You must not want it badly enough.
You must not be trying hard enough.
You must not really want out of that rut.
That framing is neat and efficient. It’s also usually wrong.
Sometimes the issue isn’t motivation at all. Sometimes the demands being placed on you don’t match how your brain actually engages, how your energy fluctuates, or how much friction you’re already carrying. No amount of “just do it” makes the wrong tool suddenly fit.
I keep thinking about how many people internalize that mismatch as a personal flaw instead of questioning the systems they’re trying to survive inside.
Anyway. That’s what’s been rattling around today.
This is Divergify.
We don't fix you. We build systems that fit your OS.